In April of 2007, I referenced a joke I once heard (and actually still remember, despite my short term memory loss due to OLD AGE)...
If you are a "good Christian" you may find offense, and I strongly encourage you to NOT read any further. Otherwise here it goes:
Turn back your mind-clock almost 2,000 years (or open your reference text to John 19:17)...
Jesus has walked through the streets of Jerusalem, bearing his own crucifixion cross, has exited the walls of the city to the unknown site known today as the Calvary...
The Romans have affixed Jesus to the cross (the means, we all have heard) and have erected the cross (with Jesus attached) to an upright position (again, in a way we are all familiar with)...
Ok, so Jesus is on the cross with the 3 Marys beneath him (apparently none of his disciples were able to attend, based on the records of fact)... This also changes the joke as I had originally heard it. I will take my artistic/literary license to alter the attendees roles based on my Wikipedia findings...
So, once again, Jesus is on the cross... he has been there for quite some time, and calls down to one of the Roman Centurions (let's call him John) who Jesus knew from his dealings with the political connections he had in Jerusalem... He says "John can you hear me?" several times before John responds: "Yes I hear you"... Jesus says to John "I need to tell you something" and John, the Roman guard (flabbergasted) says "Ok tell me"... Jesus says to him "No, you need to come up here so I can tell you". Again, John is taken aback and says "There is no way for me to get up there other than walking down this knoll and getting a ladder"... Jesus says "Ok, I'll wait"...
John walks back through the walls of the city, gets a ladder from his home, and treks back up the hill to where Jesus is coming closer and closer to death.
John props the ladder up to the crucifixion cross and starts his climb up. As he ascends, he hears Jesus say "Hurry John, I have something important to tell you"... The cross itself is not that stable in its upright position, but John tries to climb the ladder regardless, adjusting his balance as to not fall... As he gets closer to Jesus, he hears him gasping for air and asks "What is it you need to tell me?" Jesus responds in barely a whisper "Please come closer so I can tell you"...
John makes it to the top of his ladder, face to face with Jesus, and asks "What is it that you need to tell me?"... By this point Jesus is experiencing the transformation from life to death, and can barely speak. He asks John to come closer so he can whisper his message in John's ear. John obliges and leans in (despite the awkwardness of his ladder's balance) to hear what Jesus has to say...
Jesus says again: "John, I have to tell you something"... John tells Jesus he is "right here" and asks again what it is that Jesus needs to tell him... Jesus takes a deep, strained, breath before responding finally:
"John, I CAN SEE YOUR HOUSE FROM HERE"
Over and embarrassingly "Out" from Portsmouth, VA
2 comments:
I have my amateur radio license and one of the things about being a ham, especially if one enjoys the VHF and UHF bands is that you spend a fair amount of time on high buildings.
So the standard for all hams when you're up that high is to say "Look, I can see my house from here!"
Tallest building I was ever on was what we call Bradford House, others call Sister Dominica Manor.
It's only 16 stories but stands 192 feet in the air, and the block house adds another 15 feet so call it 207 feet.
Hell of a view.
I am a Christian and was not offended at all. I think Jesus must have a sense of humor. Hi I am Jake from "Who I Am". To answer your first question I am a Bi married man. And except for this one area of my life I am an open book. Any question feel free to ask either on my blog or email me at jloyler2@gmail.com LOVE AND HUGS
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