Don't be afraid to write your Lawmakers...

I have always felt that in addition to voting, we all have a responsibility to let our elected officials (whether or not we voted for them) know how we feel as their constituents...

Most times you contact them, you will get a  "canned" response to your stance.  These are not always bad, in responding, you at least get the impression they took notice...  

This is a response I received today from an email I sent Senator Warner several weeks ago:

Dear Mr. Rimington,

Thank you for contacting me with your views on the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy. In order to best represent you as your United States Senator, it is vital that I hear your views on this and other important matters.

In 1993, President Clinton, in conjunction with senior military leadership and the Senate and House Armed Service Committees, instituted the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy which bars openly gay and lesbian individuals from serving in the military.  On January 27, 2010, President Obama said in the State of the Union Address that he plans to work with senior military leadership and Congress to repeal the 1993 law.

Since then, the Senate Armed Services Committee has held a series of hearings to address the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy and has solicited the views of the Secretary of Defense, the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff and each of the Service Chiefs.  The Committee then passed a provision that would provide the Department of Defense the ability to repeal the policy after concurrence from the President, the Secretary of Defense and the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff that the repeal would not negatively impact readiness. The House of Representatives passed a similar version in their FY 2011 National Defense Authorization Bill that also includes repeal. The bill has yet to come before the whole Senate for a vote. 

I support repeal of "Don't Ask Don't Tell" in an orderly way, working with members of the uniformed services and our military leadership.   Given the complexity and sensitivity of the matter, I believe we must place great weight on the opinions of our military leadership and ensure that we are treating all service members with dignity and respect. 

Again, thank you for taking the time to contact me with your views. I will continue to keep your thoughts in mind as the situation unfolds.  As we move forward with the 111th Congress, please continue to be in touch with your opinions and concerns.

Sincerely,

MARK R. WARNER

United States Senator  

It's always a pleasure to get a  response, regardless of it's timeliness and also nice to see there was some thought in the response...

Over and "Out" from the RED State of Virginia, here in Portsmouth.

Maybe this is the "Happy Place"

Ok maybe this is my "Happy Place" I have never seen the video, but OMG what fine looking dancers she recruited to get this "off"...

From my "Happy Place" in Portsmouth, VA, I am over and "Out"

Finding a "Happy Place"...

Finding a "Happy Place" seems to be more and more difficult these days...  Michael makes me happy, work makes me happy, my friends at work and home make me happy, my blogging friends make me happy, my family makes me happy, and so on... and so on...  Why is it that I have no "Happy Place" to take refuge in?

Things at work right now are still up in the air...  I have experienced many anxiety attacks over the past few days for some reasons that are obvious and for others less conspicuous...  I dream every night about things in my past. Dreams that have no bearing on anything happening in my life right now.  They are vivid and I remember most of them.  They are intense enough that I have hit, kicked, and spoken to Michael in the middle of the night without due cause...

I feel more like Nemo and Dora in the photo above, than the starfish in the tank looking for that "Happy Place"... 

I know this will pass, I know I have a great partner, friends, and family...  I'm guessing I have inherited the family gene that makes us prone to depression...  My happy place might be making other people feel miserable while I try to locate it...

Sorry Michael, and yes I still love you, and am in love with you!

Over, "Out", and searching for my happy place, in Portsmouth, VA

To go, or not to go? To fight, or not to?

I was advised yesterday that my position (at the store I work at) is being eliminated... I met with the company's regional manager and we discussed the options...

Personally, I think this man is a total homophobe and not only racist but sexist as well...  He has offered no help to the two women Store Managers in his region... Ever...  It's almost like he wants them to fail...  I just happen to work for one of them and he knew when he promoted me into this spot, that I was gay...

I looked, not too long ago for a position up in our Philly market, while it was truly not for the promotion, it was more honestly to get myself out of this man's region...   Our company has invested alot of money in introducing the middle management folks (ie: Regional Managers) to this new philosophy of BOP (Business of People). I have read alot of the information, and it's a very positive way to manage and communicate with your people. Unfortunately, my Regional Manager doesn't get it...  Our company has been known for years to manage with an iron fist and threats, but the owners of the company decided that perhaps that was not the best way to keep strong loyal employees...

My dilemma is, do I take the position (tunnels and bridges away) in Newport News, or do I fight this thing for the possible inappropriate (and against our company's policy) discriminatory behavior on the part of our Regional Manager (because there is alot more I am not putting in here)?

Over and "Out" from what could have been a relaxing day off, in Portsmouth, VA

New Link...

I found this through a visitor to "My New Life".  All I can say is I wish I had the resources to compile this information:

The Closet Professor

Check it out... It's truly a great encylopedia of GLBT history and information...

Over and "Out" from my protected little world here in Portsmouth, VA

One Small Step + 41 Years...

I can't believe it was 41 years today that Neil Armstrong uttered those words...  I was living in Coral Gables, FL at the time, and my memories of the event are not unlike those in the Ron Howard film "Apollo 13", all gathered around the newly developed "COLORED" TV, only to see Black & White video from the lunar surface...

As an avid "Space Nut" I am glad to see some recent support of things to come with the ISS and possible expeditions further into our solar system...

I am off tomorrow and will probably post more frivolity but, for now I remain "Out" in Portsmouth, VA

Owl City... Another CRUSH!

I know... I have crushes every week...  and I posted this tomorrow, but musician/music/performance crushes don't count...  enjoy...

Over and "Crushingly OUT" from "the commonwealth of VAGINA"

To Sir With Love 2010...

I'm sorry... I was around when the original came out, but... This is awesome. Watch the faces on the cast (this was after they lost):

Over and "Out" before midnight in Portsmouth, VA

Glee for Kelly's 40th

Many of you know who Kelly Stern is, and many don't.  Regardless of your acquaintance with him, today is his 40th birthday and I wish him nothing but happiness and Glee in his next 40 years!

Been working all weekend and 12-14 hour days at that...  Off Wednesday and will have more to say I'm sure...

For now... Happy Birthday Kelly, over and "Out" from Portsmouth, VA

The Boatslip (Updated) Resort...

I have been to P-Town before.  I have stayed in some quite comfortable places.  But...  If you are truly wanting to experience Provincetown in the gay sense, You need to stay at the Boatslip Resort...

This is a picture from a fellow blogger of the deck at the Boatslip (look for the arrow, that's the room we had).

First off, the rooms are spacious and airy...  We had a Queen on the second floor (with vaulted ceilings and a modest balcony), advertised as "ocean view".  There are no rooms that sit on the ocean, so the view we had was over the point that separates Provincetown harbor from the Atlantic...  However, the benefit to an "ocean view" is that you also have a "pool view" a "harbor view" and a "cape cod bay view"... Nothing wrong with any of those... All the rooms with a "pool view" have most of the above.  Do not get the "parking lot/street view" rooms, though I suspect they are equally as nice inside, we spent alot of time on our deck "observing"...  The initial plan was to stay in P-town Wednesday and Thursday nights. As it turned out, Thursday was the most dreary day of our whole vacation, we spent most of the afternoon at "The Monkey Bar" which is part of a great Thai restaurant and an even better Sushi Bar.  Michael and the bartender invented a new drink for the bar's unique assortment called the "Spank the Monkey".  We ran into many people that day at that bar, and they all wanted to try the newest drink...  I hope the Monkey Bar adds it to their menu...

We decided to stay an extra night, Friday, so that we could recover from the alcohol induced coma we woke up to Friday morning...  I felt bad, as we were supposed to head back down to my brother's place that night and do a family thing with he and his wife (we both love the two of them) before heading back home on Saturday.  The extra day at the Boatslip allowed us to spend the day by the pool (the day was gorgeous) and experience our first "Tea Dance" at the Boatslip.  The Boatslip's Tea Dance is "THE" event in Gay Provincetown...  I have missed it on my passed visits, but we got to experience the full deal, the locals show up, the visitors show up, it's truly the "Glee" of Provincetown and it was totally awesome, we are both glad we stayed...

Speaking of  "Glee", I have heard about the show, seen the previews, but have never actually watched it... Our new neighbors upstairs had a copy of the first season and I have been watching it...  It ROCKS!  But then, I was in love with "Ugly Betty" too, so who am I to judge a TV Show...

Ok, it's taken me 3-4 days to put this post together, and I will probably post again tomorrow and will post some pictures...

Overly "Out" from the southern P-town (Portsmouth-town) VA

GoGo... GaGa...

I missed the Today Show the morning that she appeared, however if you watch this and then click on the subsequent videos (2-4) you can enjoy what I have:

And the second part:



The third:

Has been Removed...

The fourth:



Over and "Out" from a couple days off, here in Portsmouth, VA

My Niece has done it again...

I have not seen this until today, but anyone that doesn't believe that this is the way of the future... Is crazy...

Jessica, I am and always have been very proud of you!  As I'm sure your parents are...

OWYP Promo from owyp on Vimeo.

Love you Jess~!

Over and "Out" and a lot less ambitious than you...  From Portsmouth, VA...

Will DOMA be another Mistake???

I share this tonight with an enlightened heart...  While I personally don't need Federal approval to love who I love, it would be nice one day for our relationship to be recognized without prejudice so that we might enjoy some of the same federal benefits as our wonderful straight neighbors...

(From CNN at 11:04pm 07/08/2010) -- A federal judge in Boston, Massachusetts, has ruled that the federal ban on gay marriage is unconstitutional, because it interferes with an individual state's right to define marriage.

The ruling gives same-sex married couples in Massachusetts the same right to federal benefits that heterosexual couples enjoy.

U.S. District Judge Joseph Tauro ruled that "as irrational prejudice plainly never constitutes a legitimate government interest," the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) violates the protection under the Fifth Amendment to the Constitution.

Tauro ruled simultaneously in favor on two separate lawsuits that were filed by the Gay & Lesbian Advocates & Defenders (GLAD) on behalf of eight same-sex married couples and three widows, and by the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, where same-sex marriage has been permitted for over six years.

Massachusetts Attorney General Martha Coakley called the ruling "a victory for civil rights." Coakley, who attended court Thursday for the ruling, told reporters, "All citizens who are married in Massachusetts should be treated equally."

Tauro ruled that in DOMA it was "only sexual orientation that differentiates a married couple entitled to federal marriage-based benefits from one not so entitled."

He added that "the relevant distinction to be drawn is between married individuals and unmarried individuals. To further divide the class of married individuals into those with spouses of the same sex and those with spouses of the opposite sex is to create a distinction without meaning,"

Nancy Gell, one of the plaintiffs in the case said that she let out a huge "Yahoo!" when she heard the ruling on television as she was cooking dinner. "We are just absolutely thrilled, I am so happy I can't ever put it into words," she told reporters.

Coakley who said that she believed that DOMA statute had no purpose other than to discriminate, said that the ruling applied to all same-sex married couples in Massachusetts.

Gary Buseck, GLAD's legal director, said that Thursday's ruling "is for the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, so it seems to be encompassing all of the same-sex married couples in Massachusetts." He added that it would be "highly unusual" if the ruling was not appealed.

Department of Justice spokesman Tracy Schmaler said of the ruling, "We are reviewing the decision."

While I totally understand that this means nothing for Michael and me today in the Commonwealth of Virginia, it does have some immediate benefits for our brothers and sisters in the Commonwealth of Massachusetts and maybe beyond eventually...

I think our President and Supreme Court will help decide the outcome of this, very soon...

Over, "Out", and Reviewing away, from Portsmouth, VA

Twilight... The Next Generation...

I am not a huge follower of the Twilight Series.  However, I did find this photo through another fellow blogger's site:

I think it would be really cool if the "TEAMS" were thrown for a loop to find that Edward and Jacob don't give a flying fooo about Bella, but more about each other..

What a great way to continue this series...

Over and definitely "Out" from home in Portsmouth, VA

Ever Lose a Post?

I was cleaning up some clutter on my laptop and found that I had never posted this entry (I actually did post it, but found out that same day that my wife had passed away, so took it down out of respect)...  It was written shortly after Michael and I met:

Full Circle (from 1/22/09)...

Greetings from Richmond, VA... Funny how things happen, I am up here to spend a day or two with my man Michael. I started this "blog" in this city, have moved twice since then, and here I am again... Full Circle...


My boss went up to DC for the Obama inauguration, and after losing our Merch/Sales Manager, I ended up working seven days (pardon the pun) "straight"... I was exhausted and I missed my man so decided to drive up for a non-home weekend. He is at work but came home for lunch to let me in and give me a big hug (which I needed desperately). His son will be home from school shortly so I figured I'd post this little blurb before engaging with the Eight year old's psyche... I do like my man's son, he is very smart and witty... He hasn't figured us (his dad and I) out yet, but Michael promises me he will never lie about being gay, if his son asks him.


Reminds me of an event that happened not too long ago with my youngest son (who is now 23). He had found some "incriminating evidence" on the family computer regarding his dad. Now mind you I was always pretty good at wiping off any trace of the websites I visited and the chat rooms I went into, but apparently this time I was careless. He called his older sister in Miami hysterical about finding out his dad was gay. His sister (my step-daughter) called her mom (my wife) and explained the situation... My wife called me and for the first time in her life asked me to lie to one of my children. I suggested that maybe it was time to tell him about my sexuality and she emphatically replied "NO". I made up some story that, at the time, seemed plausible and hated every minute as I explained to my son what he thought he had found. I have never forgiven myself for that. I suppose he has not (forgiven me) either...


I guess what I am saying is, I am happy that Michael will not lie about who he is, to his son. If I could go back 5 years I would not either... Full Circle? or just a coincidence?


I plan on meeting some of Michael's friends tonight (yeah I am a little stressed) but think I will manage (with a couple more beers). It's meeting his Mom (she owns a gun), that scares me to death!!!


I ended up loving his friends, have met his mom (and the rest of his family) and think they are all awesome.

Over and "Out" from a year and a half later in Portsmouth, VA

THX rocks the world...

I have always liked going to movies in a theater, but I have also enjoyed viewing those movies at home, in the privacy of my own underwear...  I'm sure many of my family and friends would agree... The difference is (to me) I MUST have a great sound system (and at least a 42" HDTV) to enjoy a movie at home...  I have heard films in DTS, Dolby Digital, and THX and I have always preferred THX sound  to any of the others, perhaps because LucasFilms has been involved with many of the movies I have liked.   I also have always liked the intro/trailers for THX and "The Audience is Listening".  Here is a YouTube video of a collage of those intros, I can now hook up my laptop to my 42" HDTV and surround sound system with THX, so it probably sounds better to me.  I did notice towards the end of the intros, the sound was not synced with the picture, but hey, it's YouTube and free, so who am I to complain...

Over and "Out" from my day off in Portsmouth, VA

Best Fireworks and Wishes are always Disney!

I have the distinct privilege of representing my store (ie: working) this weekend, so my posts may be sporadic at best.  I do have a memory of one my favorite "4th of July/Independence Day" fireworks displays though. It happened on a visit to "The Wonderful, Colorful, Magical, Tolerable, Acceptable, Hap-Hap-Happiest frigging Place on Earth" better known as Walt Disney World, in Orlando Florida.  The YouTube video below is worth watching (although it was not an Independence Day celebration) it does however, represent closely my favorite experience described above:

Put on your ear-buds and turn up the volume, the music and narrative makes the program even better! I get goosebumps every time I hear and see this video...

As the Blue Fairy says: "Remember, we must always believe in our wishes... For they are the magic in the world...  Now let's put all our hearts together and make a wish come true"... How Gay is that?

I am off tomorrow (Friday) and may post then.  However, if I don't, happy 234th birthday to our great country and happy Independence Day to all of you!

Over and "Out" from an original Colony...  Portsmouth, VA

ps: I changed the title of this post after the original publishing due to the final result...  I like this title better!