Countdown to 60 - Part 8 (and probably the last)

Is this really what 60 candles looks like on top of a perfectly good cake?

One week from tomorrow is the 60th anniversary of my birth... In reality that means that I will be starting my 7th decade on this earth on the same day... Ok, I prefer turning 60 to the latter...

Just a number, right??? I keep saying that to myself to try to "ease my pain". It even works sometimes.

The best parts of this whole turning 60 thing and of 2015 in general can be summed up in this short statement:

In March I met a guy that I absolutely adore and could be happy with for a a very long time. In May I found out I am going to be a grandfather again, and finally, in August my #3 son and I started the mending process, healing wounds that were inflicted almost ten years ago... 

Life could not be better!

Over and "Out" from a good place, here in Richmond, VA...

Countdown to 60 - Part 7

What's not to LOVE about these two? My youngest child (Savannah) with my man (Jeff) hamming it up at a Sunday Drag Brunch at Godfrey's here in the RVA...

I have been a bit hesitant about posting anything about Jeff on Facebook or in here. We both agreed to take things slowly when we started dating back in March and the last thing I wanted to do was jinx things or say something that might ruin what we were building. I had overwhelmingly positive feelings about him by mid May and just felt it necessary to keep my feelings to myself as he had a really bad experience last year and just wanted to keep things simple...

During June I started expressing the way I felt towards him in an apologetic way (since the "lusty" part of our dating experience should have subsided by then). He finally told me to stop with the apologies, that he understood, yet just wasn't ready to share the same feelings. For a moment I thought I had really "screwed the pooch" (aka: messed things up)...

We have spent the past few weekends at his place (he has 2 dogs and a cat to care for so it only seemed the obvious choice). Usually we make dinner for each other and snuggle/cuddle with or without the dogs watching a DVD on Friday, sit on his awesome porch in the country with our coffee on Saturday morning, run errands and or do some chores around the house during the day, repeat with dinner and TV Saturday night, coffee on the porch Sunday morning and then church together before parting ways for the week... (intimate times are intentionally not included in this post)...

Fast forward to this past weekend...

Friday went as it usually does, as did Saturday morning and day. Saturday night we were watching TV curled up on the sofa when he told me he had to show me something... He grabbed his tablet and signed on to Facebook. He went to his Life Events and entered "In a relationship with Tom Rimington"... You could have knocked me over with a feather...

I'm not sure what happened during the past week (and really don't need or want an explanation) but it seems that we are both finally on the same page, and willing to voice our feelings about and to each other, in our relationship...

Remember my last post? Top of the bucket list? I am in love with this man and I am optimistic as to where things with us may go in the future. I am just not sure I am "worthy" of him. He is truly one of the most attractive (physically, intellectually, and morally) men I have ever met...

Over, "Out" and smitten in love, from Richmond, VA

Countdown to 60, Part 6

Thought I would repost an event that checked yet another thing off my Lifetime Bucket List. There are not many left but top on the list is to fall "In Love" again and maybe even get married again (now that I can), and number 2 is probably an Alaskan Cruise... (I may have to create a Kickstarter campaign for that one though, would you donate if you had a chance to join me?),,, What or how many things are on your Bucket List?

From February, 2006:

"For my 50th birthday this past year I decided to not only come-out, but also chose to jump-out of a perfectly good airplane. Thanks to the staff down at West Point Skydiving Adventures, http://www.skydivewestpoint.com/ , (about an hour from westend Richmond) it was one of the most awesome experiences of my life.

After arriving early Sunday morning, we sat down and, in triplicate, signed and initialed our lives away on the company release waiver (I have not signed that many documents since my last home closing). I perfectly understand why the releases are necessary however, to the faint at heart, they may have been somewhat intimidating.

Since my friends and I had chosen to do tandem jumps, where we would be strapped tightly to the front of our instructor (A few of us felt there was nothing wrong with that picture), the training was somewhat abbreviated. We were shown the proper way to walk while strapped together, the correct way to exit the aircraft and arch our backs once in free-fall (again this back arching thing came naturally and more easily to a few of us). The instructor then gave us an idea of what we would encounter during the free-fall, the deployment of the chute, the rest of the ride, and finally the landing. None of us chickened out through this process so it appeared we were good to go.

The plane used that day was the size and shape of a Henrico County school bus. Not as air-worthy appearing a I thought it should be, but then, I had made the choice to leave it in mid flight, regardless of it's flying abilities. Picture that school bus with benches running it's length on each side, then picture the entire senior class at Hermitage High School climbing aboard all with their 40lb book bags strapped to their backs. As tandem jumpers, we got to board first and sat on a bench in what we later referred to as first class. The rest of the plane filled up very quickly. By the time we were ready to take off there were bodies everywhere. Oh and just an FYI, since we all had parachutes, I assumed the seat belt laws did not apply, so I didn't expect myself to be not only strapped onto my instructor but strapped into my seat too.

We reached our jumping altitude of 14,000 feet after about 15 minutes. The climb up was very noisy as the ramp on the back of the plane was partially opened. The experienced skydivers used this time to practice their mid-air version of pilates and periodically glance over and make frightening gestures our way (I guess it's always fun to tease the new kids). Once we got to the right altitude the pilot lowered the ramp so that we could start our deplaning. The experienced jumpers wasted no time as they exited in groups, I imagine to execute some difficult formations using their arms, legs and heads while falling at 120 miles per hour. The tandem jumpers go last, I suppose so as not to get in the way of those wanting to go 125-130 mph. Before deplaning, our instructors cinched up all the straps holding us together, we then spend an awkward 5 minutes trying to stand from a very uncomfortable sitting position. Once on our feet, we aim for the rear of the plane and the ramp leading to nowhere.

That last step was interesting. As we fell, legs first, into the baby blue Central Virginia sky, the air flowing under the plane caught our legs and flipped us end over end. The instructor levels us out and taps me on the side to signal me that it was time to arch, which I promptly did. Now let me try to describe what you hear while all this is going on. When you have a chance, go over to your TV, tune it to channel 3, turn off your cable box and VCR/DVD, and turn up the volume on your 500watt surround sound system, with your head between the front two speakers. There is absolutely no vocal communication while free-falling, everything is done with pre-determined hand gestures. After what seemed like about 10 minutes, our 30 second free fall came to an end as the instructor tapped the altimeter on my wrist and I pulled the cord on our chute. You can feel the fabric start unfurling from the case on the instructors back, but until it opens and catches the sky, you have no idea what it feels like to be stopped in mid-air. You also re thank your instructor for checking and tightening those straps one last time before exiting the plane. What started out as a blur accompanied by a mind deafening noise, suddenly became the most tranquil, heavenly experience. The instructor tells me (yes you can hear at this point) that he is going to loosen the straps now, and that it may feel like he's letting me go (he actually said that to me) but it would be more comfortable for the remainder of the jump if the straps were loosened. The balance of our ride was like nothing I can describe. It had all the thrills of an "E" ticket ride at Disneyland (which by the way also turned 50 last year) and all the serenity of sailing in Biscayne Bay on a clear cool Miami autumn day. The flight after deployment of the chute probably didn't take more than 5-10 minutes but it seemed (in a very good way) to last 3-4 times that. As we got closer to the ground the instructor reminded me to lift and hold up my legs as we land (once again some men do this easier than others) so as not to get in his way as he tries to soften the landing. I held them up as we came down and in for our landing, which started out as a 2 point, on his feet, landing and ended up with both of us on our bums.

I could not have asked for a more enjoyable 50th/coming out experience. Thank you Lee, Philip, Tim, Andre, and the wonderful staff at West Point Skydiving Adventures, you guys all ROCK!

If you ever thought you'd like to try skydiving, JUST DO IT, you won't be sorry!"

Over and "Out", almost ten years later, from Richmond, VA

Countdown to 60, Part 5

I like this guy! 

My favorite guy and I had a great conversation this morning... It wasn't about anything in particular but he reminded me through it that Sarcasm is truly a language and an art form, and that after almost 60 years, I have become quite proficient at it.

It tickles my boat when I get to chat with him early in the morning, before his pessimistic guard goes up. I see a few more good reasons to tow the line, and stay the course... He definitely has potential.

He and I see things through different glasses. He shared a joke with me when I suggested that he usually sees the "glass half empty" and here it is:

Joke: I went to the psychiatrist and he set a glass of water in the desk.

He asked me if I saw myself as a glass half empty person or a glass half full person?

I picked up the glass, drank the water, and said I see myself as a problem solver!!

He later suggested, after I said I would have found a smaller glass and filled it to the top, that he would have "watered the Doctor's begonia, in the window, with it"...

What are you? Sarcastic - Half Empty

or                  Sarcastic - Half Full

Over and "out" on the 239th Birthday of our great nation, from Richmond, VA

Countdown to 60, Part 4

Ten years ago, when I came out to my family and friends, I would have never thought this would happen in the 10th year... I can say only one thing: "Thank you to all that came out before me and thank you to all that have supported equality"... That is all...

Over and proudly "Out" from Richmond, VA

Countdown to 60, Part 3

I don't plan on jinxing anything here by offering up any specifics, but I will confess that I have found someone that intrigues me, excites me, makes me question things, and helps me see things from a different perspective. I'm not sure if this person "feels" the same way about me, other than we have been dating for a little over three months now... I am staying optimistic and cautious at the same time while trying to keep my expectations in check...

I know what lust feels like, I know what "like" feels like, and I know what it feels like to have a soulmate, but after almost 60 years I'm not sure I know what true love feels like, if that makes sense.

Sure I have seen the movies and read the books about the subject but the lines seem muddled between like, lust, soulmate and true love.

In my early 20's I thought I fell in love. I got married and we had two wonderful sons. Something wasn't right and in less than 7 years we grew in different directions and parted ways. Over the years since then I realized that I did love this person but not in a "partnership" kind of way. She was an awesome person, daughter, and mother and I cherished the friendship we had until her passing...

In my early 30's I thought I fell in love again. This person could finish my sentences, as I could her's. We got married and had a son and a daughter. I could talk to her about anything. Unfortunately, talking about them and acting on some of those feelings are two different things. After we each had serious health scares, the communications faltered and after 19 years we (more accurately, I) decided it was wrong to continue to live a lie. She did not handle things that well and we did not speak much afterwards. There were many things I would have enjoyed sharing with her, but alas, she too was called from this earth a few years later.

In my 50's I found what I thought was love again, twice... They each had different definitions of loyalty and fidelity than I did. Both were good people but both relationships ended with someone's feelings getting hurt.

I guess the "jist" of this post is; What is "True Love"? I look back on my past and wonder if I really deserve to know what the meaning really is. This new acquaintance has kept me in check by insisting on taking things slowly. I am grateful for that in a way, as I do have a tendency to "leap before I look" when it comes to relationships.

On this fathers day I must say that I have been blessed with wonderful children (and grandchildren) and while I may not say it often, I am very proud of all of them and Love them all unconditionally.

We'll see how it goes for me on the Countdown to Sixty...

Over and "Out" from Richmond, VA

Living "Out" posts from Pride Months Past:

Sometimes I even impress myself at almost 60...

I experienced this event and wrote this 6 years ago. Funny thing is, I recently had a similar conversation with another fellow associate:

"We all wonder at times why we are, what we are, and who we are. I have always considered teaching to be one of the more honorable professions and even considered going back to school to pick up a teaching degree. That said, it never happened.

What I did realize not too long ago, is that I am teaching every day. Through my openness, compassion, and ability to articulate, I teach my fellow humans every day about being gay. I teach not tolerance, but acceptance. Recently an associate of mine came to me and said "Tom, I just don't get it" referring to being gay and what it is that we wanted. After considering the circumstances, I used the best analogy I could. This was a middle aged black man making the statement. My response centered around the equal rights movement of the 60's. I explained that all "we" wanted was what everyone else wants. The right to love whomever we choose, the right to make binding agreements that are recognized and honored by all, and acceptance by our fellow humans. I likened our plight to that of his own, and reminded him that it wasn't long ago that African Americans were treated with a similar stigma.

I looked at him and said "I don't expect you to understand why it is that I can fall in love with another man. Just like you should not expect me to understand what it is like to be a person of color. Regardless of our inability to feel each others' feelings, we need to accept each other and respect those differences to make life work in this world". I was so proud of myself, and still am. I have no idea where the words came from, but he "Got IT", shook my hand and told me what a pleasure it was to know me... What else could I possibly need or want?"

Over and "Out" from Richmond, VA

Countdown to 60, Part 2

Forrest Gump?

A new associate and I were chatting over "lunch" the other night at work. We were sharing life stories and after all was said and done, she likened my life to that of Tom Hanks character in the movie of the same name...

I wasn't offended as much as I was taken back a bit. My life has had no where near the number of encounters or event participation that Forrest had during his, or has it?

I was born in Pennsylvania when Dwight Eisenhower was President.

I moved to California when I was two.

I remember my older brother's 5th birthday (I was 3).

My Dad helped design the Minuteman Missile.

Traveled by car in the 60's to more than 20 of the lower 48.

Moved to the Virgin Islands before my 13th birthday.

Spent most of my teenage years living on a 66' Sailboat.

Cruised with family to most of the Bahamian Islands.

Met Buddy Ebsen (Beverly Hillbillies) when I was 16.

Had lunch with Carol Burnett when I was 20.

Made several trips up and down the east coast Intercoastal Waterway.

Had drinks with Walter Cronkite on his sailboat in Miami.

Ran a 48' private yacht for a Miami restaurant owner.

Ran a 70' private yacht for a Bermudian businessman.

Attended Miami-Dade College.

Got married, had two sons, bought first house.

Got divorced.

Remarried, had another son an a daughter.

Met and worked with most of the cast from 3 Star Trek TV Shows.

Worked for Burger King Corp and Burdines/Macy's in Miami.

Worked for Circuit City in Ft Lauderdale before moving to Richmond.

Jumped out of an airplane for my 50th birthday.

Came "Out of the closet" the same year.

Moved to Williamsburg and then to Portsmouth (VA).

Met my biological father (Pop).

Have 3 wonderful grandchildren (with another on the way).

Had two relationships since coming out (hopefully a 3rd on the way).

Wow... There are so many other things I have done, places I have been, and great people I have met along the way... Maybe I am a little like Forrest after all... On the other hand there are so many things I still want to do, places i want to go, and people I want to get to know... Ahhhh, plenty of time still!

Stay tuned for more adventures (and probable misadventures) leading up to and beyond the countdown to Sixty!

Over and "Out", from Richmond, VA

Countdown to 60, Part 1

Yes, I'm back, alive and kicking...

Who'd of thought that I would ever be counting down the months, weeks and days to the 60th anniversary of my birth?

For those (few) of you that have followed me since 2006 and are not "friends" of mine on facebook, the tail end of 2014 was "interesting" to say the least... Christmas Eve, after working the night before, I was feeling a familiar tightness in my chest that wouldn't go away. Long story short, after my initial "cardiac event" almost 10 years earlier, and a follow-up visit from the widowmaker in 2013, I was once again having a minor heart attack.

After an angioplasty on Christmas Day my cardiologist informed me that the 5 previously installed stents were not doing the job they were intended to do and that I had additional blockage that needed tending to... Enter the need for a double bypass, Merry (frigging) Christmas to me!

Surgery could not be scheduled until the 29th and due to the potential risk, the hospital would not let me go home until after it was done.

Double bypass became a triple and after 5 additional recovery days I was released on the 2nd day of 2015 with a new scar from my neck to the base of my ribcage...

After a month at home recovering (and not driving) I finally got to return to work and the real world around the 10th anniversary of my first MI and the 9th "blogoversary" of "My New Life"...

Since then, 2015 is turning out to be pretty darn good... My limitations at work have been lifted, I don't have to fear the power of a car's airbag anymore, sneezing and coughing no longer feel like they will blow my chest out, and I have even gone out on a few "dates"...

Thank you to all my family and friends that have supported me through it all... I even got a visit in the hospital from Kelly (the first fellow blogger to comment on mine) over at "Rambling along in Life with a Stern point of view"...

Now that I am semi caught up, the countdown to 60 will continue periodically, so check back for new adventures and mis-adventures as "My New Life" continues in it's 10th year!

Over and "Out", from Richmond, VA

I am alive and well...

Looking forward to a great 2015! That is all for now...

Putting the SCOTUS Feet to the Fire...

Looks like a majority of the United States want this expedited:

Thirty-two states that either allow gay marriage or have banned it asked the U.S. Supreme Court on Thursday to settle the issue once and for all.

Fifteen states that allow gay marriage, led by Massachusetts, filed a brief asking the justices to take up three cases from Virginia, Utah and Oklahoma and overturn bans. And 17 other states, led by Colorado, that have banned the practice asked the court to hear cases from Utah and Oklahoma to clear up a "morass" of lawsuits, but didn't urge the court to rule one way or another.

The filing came as a three-judge panel of the 7th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in Chicago ruled that same-sex marriage bans in Wisconsin and Indiana are unconstitutional. The unanimous decision Thursday criticized the justifications both states gave, several times singling out the argument that marriage between a man and a woman is tradition. There are, the court noted, good and bad traditions.

The experience of Massachusetts - the first state to legalize gay marriage - shows that allowing same-sex couples to wed has only benefited families and strengthened the institution of marriage, said Attorney General Martha Coakley.

"Laws that bar same-sex couples from marrying are discriminatory and unconstitutional," she said. "The time has come for this critical issue to be resolved."

Massachusetts was joined by California, Connecticut, Delaware, Hawaii, Illinois, Iowa, Maine, Maryland, New Mexico, New York, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Vermont, and Washington.

Colorado's brief argued that the definition of marriage faces legal challenges only the Supreme Court can resolve, and that without a Supreme Court decision, states defending bans could be liable for huge legal bills from future lawsuits if they are overturned. It was written by Daniel D. Domenico, the state's solicitor general, and Michael Lee Francisco, assistant solicitor general.

Colorado was joined by Alabama, Alaska, Arizona, Georgia, Idaho, Louisiana, Mississippi, Missouri, Montana, Nebraska, North Dakota, Oklahoma, South Carolina, South Dakota, West Virginia and Wisconsin.

These are the cases addressed in the briefs:

In Virginia, the 4th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals ruled in July that the state's voter-approved ban is unconstitutional. The state has appealed to the U.S. Supreme Court, which hasn't said whether it will accept the case. But the high court granted a request on Aug. 20 from a county clerk to delay implementation of the ruling, which would have allowed same-sex couples to marry beginning the next day.

In Oklahoma, an appeals court tossed the state's ban in July but put its ruling on hold pending an appeal, meaning same-sex couples can't marry in Oklahoma for now. Attorneys representing the Tulsa County court clerk - who refused to issue a marriage license for a lesbian couple there - asked the Supreme Court this month to hear the case.

In Utah, the 10th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in Denver ruled this summer that Utah must allow gay couples to marry, though it put the ruling on hold pending an appeal. The state has asked the U.S. Supreme Court to uphold the state's ban.

What do you think? Time to hear this?

Over and "Out" from Richmond, VA

The Next Day... Part Three... (The move back)

The cycle ends...

It took me about a week or two of drinking good old fashioned sweet tea all day long. I found I relied on fluids to fill that empty hole, but later reverted to something more traditional called "Eating"...

The job market in North Central Florida was not a whole lot better than it was in the Tidewater area of Virginia, but I did manage to land an eight week assignment through a local temp agency working with the Store Planning team on a Walmart remodel. After getting used to working and having a paycheck again I soon realized that the reasons I had chosen to move down to Florida really didn't play out as I had hoped they would. My son and my grandchildren's mother have a different style of raising kids than I was used to. Without getting into any of the details, I found that 1) I didn't possess the patience I once had around "toddlers", and 2) I refused to engage in any of the peripheral drama that kept popping up while I was a "guest" in their home...

When the 8 week project was done, the temp service couldn't find me another assignment and after six months back in Florida, I came to the realization that I really didn't like it don there and remembered why I was happy to leave the Sunshine State back in 1999. I started sending applications and resumes out to employers in the Richmond area and within a week had set up interviews (after the initial phone interview) with two different companies. It was time to thank my High Springs family, pack up the "Cruiser", and head back up to Virginia...

I arrived in Richmond on a Wednesday. By Friday I had been hired by one of the employers and by the following Wednesday had the 2nd interview. Start date for the first was not set and since the 2nd was a much better (and higher paying) position, I waited until the very last minute to start with The Home Depot in hopes that the 2nd offer might happen. I'm in week #3 now with the overnight Merchandise Execution Team (MET) at the "Homo Depot"...

While I have not given up on drinking, I find I go weeks without wanting one. I also find that when I have had a "party" night, my tolerance has greatly diminished as has the quantity of consumption. 

Now that I have brought you up to date, I will begin my next post with something "gayer"...

Over and "Out", on a very HOT day, from Richmond, VA 

The Next Day... Part Two... (Alcohol)

"Tommy, you're not an alcoholic/addicted so long as you can: 1) Not drink for one full day out of a week... 2) Not drink for one full week out of a month... and 3) Not drink for one full month out of a year..." - My Mother

I was well beyond the above when, in May of 2013 (just over 8 years since the first), I had my second heart attack and three additional stents added to my collection. 

Weeks off and on, to and home from work over the next few months took a toll on my attendance record. My anxiety attacks returned leading to periodic depression. Truth is, during that time I truly believed I (and my family) would have been better off if I had not survived.

One day in October Mike stopped drinking... Three weeks later he moved out. While we had pretty much just a house-mate type of relationship, we were friends and I was happy that he was moving on with and sobering up his life... I haven't talked to him since...

After several weeks of living alone, I rented out the guest room to a very nice (very straight) guy to help with the finances. It was nice to have someone there that appreciated the space for him and his sweet golden lab Max. Our schedules were pretty much opposite of each other until Thanksgiving when I lost my job due to the above mentioned attendance issues. Life in the place I called home in Portsmouth, for almost 5 years, was about to end. Yet the drinking continued...

I sold off everything I could to continue paying the rent and utilities while trying to find another job but ultimately, by mid January 2014, realized I couldn't keep my landlord at bay any longer. I talked to my #2 son about moving in with him, his 3 kids and their mother down near Gainesville, FL... They welcomed the idea with open arms. And the drinking continued...

By the first week of February I had packed what belongings I could, into my car (leaving the rest), and drove down to High Springs, FL to start all over again. The first thing I bought (with the limited funds I had) when I got there was an 18 pack of beer (in cans no less)...

Jobs in north central Florida were not that plentiful and neither was the length of my Virginia unemployment benefits. The day came that I couldn't afford to buy a beer...

So I didn't... and the cycle ended...

There's more to come my friends... Stay tuned for more of "The Next Day"...

Over and "Out" on a beautiful Sunday here in Richmond, VA

The Next Day... Part One... (Alcohol)

In an attempt to make sense of the past year I need to backtrack a bit and fill in some blanks. I think the best place to start is with alcohol and the affects it had on and around me...

When Mike and I first met back in January of 2009 I knew that he liked his Malibu and Cranberry... I also knew (from my past) that under the right circumstances I used an overindulgence of Miller Lite (yes, I know, most beer enthusiasts do not consider Lite to be a real beer...  In my defense however, as a proud gay man, I did only buy it in bottles) to cope with stressful situations. 

During the first couple of years of our relationship there was little to no stress other than we both worked retail and rarely had the same days off. The invisible "elephant in the room" was that during those days off we both began drinking in excess. It grew worse over the years to come. It started to affect me and my work. I began making irrational decisions about my career and as a result of those poor choices, lost my job.

Job searching became a career in itself for me. My life had evolved into filling out online applications, watching hours of TV, not getting out of my flannels, not showering or taking care of our home or myself, collecting unemployment, and of course drinking even more heavily... 

While I knew the drinking was impairing my judgement at times, I blamed most of my excess and problems on Mike, as his days off were spent drinking right along side of me. I let that ugly "blame" creature take away any respect I had for Mike and the relationship eventually nose dived as a result. It was HIS fault, not mine (or so I convinced myself as I still drowned my self-pity in daily 18 packs of liquid courage)... 

In January of 2013, over a year and a half after I lost my job, I got hired as a technical support rep for our local cable service. I was ecstatic that I landed the job and looked forward to proving myself with them and working my way up the ladder. My schedule wasn't bad (I worked 5pm to 2am) and I had two days off in a row (Tuesday and Wednesday). Life was going to be great for Mike, Mr Lite, Mr Malibu, and me. The relationship had pretty much ended by then but we remained friends and house-mates... 

Stay tuned for the next episode folks... It only gets __________ (fill in the blank)!

Over and "Out" on an overcast day, from Richmond, VA

I am ALIVE!

Yes, you heard me right... I am going to take some time and try to make sense of the past year through putting words to paper (so to speak) on the happenings and why I stopped writing in general.

For those of you that may still have a link to "My New Life", I thank you! I still actually get little deposits from the ads in here every now and then and every nickel counts these days.

So here it is, the end of August 2014 and I have returned to the originating city of this page, Richmond, (Virginia) over eight years since it's inception. I made a few zigs and zags (and misguided choices) to get here but couldn't be happier to return.

Over the next few weeks I will chronicle my travels...

Over and "Out" once again from Richmond, VA (the RVA)!

Since March 2013 (November 2013)

I can't believe I have been away since March of this year... I periodically read older posts of mine just to make sure my memory hasn't faded too much... Which, I'm afraid it may have...

I was notified today by one of the "ad" services I use here that they needed a valid account to send my earnings to... I have never received a dime for any of my gay-banter posted here and was shocked to hear they had $100 to send me. I am fine with an extra "Ben Franklin" being sent my way, but I also realized I had not posted anything here since March of this year... Bad Me!

Some of my blogging friends follow me on my Facebook page and know, but for the rest of the folks that follow me here, here are a few updates:

April 2013: I was revisited by the "widowmaker" and had my second heart attack. I am doing fine and have 3 more stents added to the two originally placed in 2006... Almost bionic but not quite...

September 2013: A year after the passing of my first wife (to the day), my niece gave birth to Penelope Rose, shortly after my other niece gave birth to her daughter Kinley Elizabeth. Welcome to all the new family gals...

October 2013: Finally realized the "relationship" I was in was not healthy for either of us and asked Mike to leave... After he moved back to Richmond, I found a neighbor to take Ubu...

November 2013: Living alone until I can find a financial roomate, shouldn't take long...

Hopefully I will come back here and post something periodically... But until then, I am:

Over and "Out" from Portsmouth, VA

Seven Years Strong

I can't believe I missed my own Blogoversary... Seven years for "My New Life" and eight for my "Cardiac Event", wow time has certainly flown by...

The hint (above) shows a group of my company's mascots. Some of you may recognize "Digi" and some may not. We service different regions of the country but the tag line is "Your Friend in the Digital Age" and I am proud to be part of this company...

After eight weeks of training, tonight was my first night in "production". My schedule is 5:00pm to 2:00am, Wednesday through Sunday. It will be a challenge to get my body to cooperate with the change, but the growth potential is well worth the sacrifice. The people are wonderful and now that my cubicle has been properly disinfected and cleaned, I feel right at home next to the 2nd floor window...

With my schedule as it is, I hope to post here on a much more consistent basis, so for all of you that have stuck with me for these seven years thank you and hang in there, there is more to come...

Over and "Out" from Portsmouth, VA 

Groundhog Day 2013

Guess what everyone?

Yep, that's right... I'm going to try to get back into posting things here...

I finally re-established myself in the land of the employed and couldn't be happier. The company that chose me is awesome (I will probably reveal the name after I get through the 90 day probationary period) and has been on scored 90-100 over the past several years on HRC's Corporate Equality Index... 

While going through orientation this past week, one day was dedicated to "Creating an Inclusive Environment" and wouldn't you know??? I kinda "outed" myself to the whole class...

We had a healthy discussion (the instructor was very engaging) going on about the "N" word (after one black gal had a hard time using the word "white" when referring to us white folks). Another black guy stated that he didn't mind being called the "N" word if it was used in conversation by another person of color... Before my brain engaged, I said "I totally understood" and while I have never used the "N" word, I felt the same about the words FAG or FAGGOT... For some reason, I don't mind the word if it comes from a fellow gay, but if it is used by a straight person, it bothers the heck out of me...

What are your thoughts?

Over, "Out", and back online from Portsmouth, VA

Taking a Break...

It's probably obvious already to some, but I have temporarily lost my writing "thingy". I guess with trying to get back into the workplace, I kind of feel potential employers may be "googling" my name and finding this.

While there is nothing posted here (in the past 7 years) I am ashamed of, I just need to eliminate a potential offense to some unknown future employer...

I am going to leave things up for a bit, but block all access/deactivate in the short term.

For those who know me (or of me) personally, Facebook is your best bet to keep in touch... Thank you all for following along with me on my journey.

Over and (temporarily) "Out" from Portsmouth, VA

"Grand" Times... Part 2

The twins, Hailey and Haiden, are definitely a handful... They are fine for the the most part until Mommy or Daddy come into their view and then all they seem to want is to be held. The photo above is Haiden and the one below is Hailey.

Hailey is the talker... da-da, ma-ma, etc... and has what we all refer to as "lip-a-tude", her bottom lip is always a bit pursed... Haiden has the motor skills and crawls like a race car, pulls himself up to his feet, and has the funniest laugh which he does with his face all scrunched up.

Yesterday was my day to experience the 24 hour bug we have been passing around to each other. I quarantined myself in my room (in between mad dashes to the bathroom). I was supposed to meet a good friend up in Ft. Lauderdale for lunch today on my way up to visit my Mom up in Melbourne Beach. I thought I might be ok this morning, but I am still just not feeling great and don't want to pass this thing on to either of them... I will head up to Mom's tomorrow and hopefully get together with my friend on the way up or on the way back down to Miami on Monday.

My flight leaves Tuesday to head back to Virginia. I will welcome the cooler weather at home. It's just too damned hot and humid down here...

Over and "Out" on another hot day here in Miami, FL USA